Ring of Vigor

Wondrous Item – Rare

Description

You live an action-packed life, you kick ass and party until the sun rises, so isn’t it time you talked to your enchanter about a Ring of Vigor? With a process as easy as putting on a ring, you’ll never again have to worry about staying aroused.

If arousal lasts longer than four hours, right on bruh, but also you suffer one level of exhaustion for every additional hour you wear the ring.

Side Effects May Include:

Headache, diarrhea, upset stomach, dizziness, heartburn, runny or stuffy nose, desire to summon demons, nosebleeds, difficulty falling or staying asleep, reptile regurgitation, numbness or tingling in the hands, arms, feet, or legs, muscle pain or back pain, sensitivity to light, spontaneous combustion, irregular heartbeat, shortness of breath, swelling in your hands, ankles, or feet, ringing in your ears or sudden hearing loss, instant transportation to the Nine Hells, seizures, feeling like you might pass out, rash, burning or itching while urinating, and a newfound appreciation for country music.